Loving Two

This is a favorite poem of mine. It very accurately describes the feelings I felt during my pregnancy. I worried so much about how Evan would feel and how I would feel once Chloe was born. And when she was born, I was so worried that I would upset him or hurt his feelings by making a big fuss over her. I tried so hard not to call her "punkin" since that is what I've always called him, but of course it came right out of my mouth a million times. But, so far they have an amazing relationship. He loves his baby sister very much. I pray they will always be close.

Loving Two

I walk along holding your two-year-old hand in the glow of our magical relationship. Suddenly I feel a kick from within, as if to remind me that our time alone is limited. And I wonder, “How could I ever love another child as much as I love you?” Then the baby is born and I watch you. I watch the pain you feel at having to share me as you’ve never shared me before. I hear you telling me in your own way, “Please love only me.” And I hear myself telling you in mine, “I can’t,” knowing in fact that I never can again.
Sometimes you cry and I cry with you. I almost see our new baby as an intruder on the precious relationship we once shared. A relationship that we will never have just exactly the same again. But then, barely noticing, I find myself attached to that new being and feeling almost guilty. I’m afraid to let you see me enjoying your new sibling… as though I am betraying you. But then I notice your resentment change, first to curiosity, then to protectiveness, and finally to genuine affection. More days pass, and we are settling into a new routine. The memory of days with just the two of us is fading fast. Something else is replacing those wonderful times we shared, just we two. There are new times… only now we are three. I watch the love between you grow, the way you look at each other, touch each other. I watch how she adores you… as I have for so long. I see how excited you are by each new accomplishment. And I begin to realize that I haven’t taken something from you. I’ve given something to you. I notice that I am no longer afraid to share my love openly with both of you. I find that my love for each of is different as you are, but equally strong. And my question is finally answered, to my amazement. Yes, I can love another child as much as I love you, but differently.
And although I realize that you may have to share my time, I now know you will never have to share my love. There is enough for both of you. Instead of dividing the love I have in my heart for you the love was multiplied by two. Now my heart swells over with double the love. Love for each of you… you each have your own supply which will never run out.
I love you… both. And I thank you for blessing my life.
--Author Unknown

Jumpity Jump

We went to Jumpity Jump for Madelyn's birthday party this weekend. Evan had a wonderful time! He was so excited for her to open her unicorn. Actually, what he wanted was for her to open it so he could play with it because I had told him he could not open it up, she had to open it.

Evan and Daddy in the Bounce House (as Evan called it).

Evan climbing on the obstacle course.

Daddy and Dave hiding out. Where are all the kids?

Love You Forever

I felt the need to "reconnect" to Evan tonight. The last few days have been kind of rough on the two of us. He has really been pushing the limits (and my buttons) and my patience have been kind of thin. That has not made for a really happy combination. We've had a lot of tears and fussing and time-out and tonight while I was trying to get Chloe into bed and he was crawling all over me and her and my bed with his very dirty self after playing in the dry, dusty, dirt, and I had told him to stop or move or get down for what felt like the millionth time.... I finally said to myself, stop, relax, and just let him be a kid. So, after getting Chloe into the bed and getting him a bath I asked him if I could pick out one of the stories for us to read for bedtime tonight. We always read two books for bedtime and I told him that he could pick one and I could pick one because I had a very special story for him. To my utter surprise he did not argue about this and was actually even excited about it! I already knew which book I was going to pick... Love You Forever by Robert Munsch. When I was pregnant with Evan my mother-in-law found this book at her house and gave it to me, not really even knowing what it was about. When I read it, I became all choked up and from that moment on it has been special to me. Later, a teacher at my old school, Jenny, gave me a hardback copy for Evan's first birthday. Inside she wrote to Evan to "always be sweet to his mommy" and that "little boys were precious to their mommy's hearts". I have read this book to Evan many many times, but it has been a long time since we've read it because he now picks out the books and we always end up reading Cars or Kung Fu Panda it seems. He was now at an age to actually kind of understand the meaning behind the book.

For those of you who may be unfamiliar with the book, it begins with a mother holding and rocking her very new baby boy and singing a special song. It then goes through the crazy years of her son's life... 2 years old, 9 years old, teenager, and into adulthood when the son moves out. Throughout the book, no matter how crazy the son drives the mother she still creeps into his room at night and if her son is really asleep she picks him up and rocks him back and forth back and forth. As we went through the book, I explained to him what was happening and how the mommy felt. At the end of the book, the mother is older and she asks the son to come and see her because she is old and sick. When he comes, she tries to sing her song for him, but she cannot finish. The son then picks up his mother and rocks her back and forth and sings the song to her. When he gets home that night, he feels sad about his mother, and then he goes into his very new daughter's room and picks her up and sings the special song to her.

As I read the book, I became choked up like I always do and I snuggled very close to my little boy who sometimes drives me CRAZY these days. I smelled his clean hair and felt the still baby-smooth skin of his cheek. And I could see him light up and take comfort in that love. To my surprise when I finished the book he wanted me to read it again, and when we finished it a second time he wanted me to say the words of the song over and over again:

I'll love you forever

I'll like you for always

As long as I'm living

My baby you'll be

And to my great joy and delight after we'd turned out the light and I was snuggling with him. He leaned over and took my face in his two hands and leaned in very close and began saying the words of the song. He kept forgetting the words and would ask for help, but as soon as I'd start telling him he'd say "Stop let me say them". He wanted to get to the end by himself because this is what he said:

I'll love you forever

I'll like you for always

As long as I'm living

My MOMMY you'll be (which is what the son says as he rocks his mother at the end of the book).

He then gave me nose kisses. I snuggled with him and thanked God for my little boy and then prayed that I would have the patience and wisdom to know how to teach him right from wrong without ever causing him to question my love for him or bruising his precious little soul.

Lullaby and Goodnight

Evan likes to sing his favorite songs to Chloe when she starts getting sleepy. I question the appropriateness of his songs sometimes (yes, that is Tom Petty he's singing), but they seem to work! (Sorry about the poor filming skills).

I love to watch Chloe sleep. She is so adorable and I love seeing all the little faces she makes while she sleeps as well. Just like Evan, she loves to be swaddled (in his blue and green blankets), but she sometimes works her little hands up near her face and it is so precious! I'd say at least one day a week I snuggle with her on the couch or in the bed while she sleeps during Evan's naptime (and Matthew wonders why the house is a mess). I can't help it, I know it won't be long that I'll be able to just snuggle and watch her and breathe in her smell. It's the little details like how she looks when she smiles in her sleep that I really want to store away in my memory.

It's a Tuttle Injun, Dude!

Thank you Brian and Beth for the TMNT costume! Evan LOVES it! I just hope it holds up until Halloween, LOL!

Two Months Old

Chloe was two months old on Thursday. She went for her two month checkup yesterday. She weighed 10 pounds 15.5 oz which is the 54% and was 23 3/8 inches long which is the 82% (I guess she is going to be tall, too). Her head was 38 cm which is the 32%. Dr. Blevins said she was doing great! She is growing well and is doing all the right things developmentally.. smiling, cooing, reaching for things, batting objects, recognizes mommy and daddy's face, etc. Dr. Blevins always goes on and on about how beautiful she is (which we agree of course), but I'm sure he says that to all the new mommies, ha! She had to have her first round of immunizations yesterday. She got three injections and an oral vaccine for the rotavirus. She is well on her way to being protected against pneumococcal disease, polio, Hib, diphtheria, tetanus, and pertussis, and had her second dose of the hepatitis B vaccine. She cried alot when she got the shots. It is actually the hardest and longest she has ever cried in her life because she is such a good baby. Bless her heart, I almost cried too when she finally calmed down and I laid her on the table to dress her and she tried her best to smile at me through her tears. Of course it broke my heart, but I do feel strongly that it is important to protect her. She tolerated the vaccines well. She ran a very low grade temperature last night and her legs were very sore, but we gave her a warm bath and this morning she seems to be feeling much better. I've included a little video of her "talking" to me from Thursday.

Like Brother, Like Sister

The other day while I was cooking dinner, I saw Chloe laughing and giggling at her little bears dancing above her swing. I had to grab my camera because it brought back such sweet memories of Evan doing the exact same thing when he was about her age. I clearly remember working at the computer one day and Evan sitting in his swing beside me when he started laughing and giggling hysterically at the exact same bears in the exact same swing. Either our children like the same things, or Graco really knows what will make 2 month olds happy!

And Evan laughing at the same bears:

A Tea Party and a Baby Shower

Evan had his first tea party and it was a true man's tea party. The guests of honor were Mack, Lightning McQueen, and Chick. (Notice the remote controls that are in very close proximity to the tea party).

And Chloe attended her first baby shower on Saturday. It was for my friend Bev who is expecting Baby Olivia in October. I'm sure she and Chloe will be great friends! It was wonderful to see most of my best friends from college this weekend. (We missed you, Jaime). Although, I've known my friend Robin most of my life, the rest of us all became friends when we met through our sorority, Alpha Xi Delta, in college. And although we've now been out of college for 8 or 9 years (has it really been that long?!) we have remained close and now get together several times a year with our families. It is a very special bond and, for me, the closest thing I have to sisters since I was only blessed with brothers. Chloe wore an outfit that my friend Amanda made for her and gave me at my baby shower. She looked adorable!

It's Football Time...

Matthew is coaching football this year. It is our school's first year with a football team. He really enjoys it and I'm learning to be a coach's wife. Evan and I have enjoyed going to the scrimmages and can't wait for the games to start.

Evan watching the action at the scrimmage last night. Our new team played an established team with a very good reputation and tied- Zero to Zero. Good job defense!

Matthew in action!

Our team- Go Panthers!

Matthew giving Evan his whistle.

And of course we are all looking forward to the college football season starting... GO VOLS!

My Hero!

So, this morning as I was sitting at the kitchen counter I see a bug crawl across the counter. Eww gross! We have been overrun with various bugs that I have never seen before this summer. Anyway, although I don't love bugs I usually prefer to leave them alone and let them go their own way as opposed to killing them because it grosses me out. Well, this one started toward me, so as any self-respecting lady would do I grabbed the remote control and tried to smash it. It immediately started moving at warp speed toward me. Here is the scene that followed.

Me: Small scream, frantically hitting the counter with the remote control.
Evan: (Comes running from the family room) "What's going on in here?"
Me: "There's a bug!"
Evan: "Is it a "cary" (scary) bug?"
Me: "Yes" (I've now injured it to where it is no longer running, but still moving)
Evan: (runs out to his playroom, returns with his toy steering wheel which has a large flat base on it and promptly drops it on the offender and grinds it into the counter a little for good measure. He then picks it up and checks out the damage.) "There you go! NOW it is dead." (and calmly leaves the room).

What would Chloe and I do without our strong man here with us?

Ready, Aim, FIRE!

Since Evan was born, bath time with our children has always been a favorite time. Both of our children really enjoy bath time and have a blast splashing and playing in the water. Recently, Matthew brought Evan home a pack of new squirt guns as a "surprise" to play with in the bathtub. Each night since then we have a water fight when I come up to get him out of the bath. All three of us have a squirt gun (or two) and Matthew and I both end up soaked, but it's so fun!






This is Evan's favorite towel. My friend, Amanda, embroidered it for him for his birthday. We have to wash it almost every single day so that he can have it for his bath.




Chloe enjoys her bath, too. Especially when big brother Evan helps and entertains her. I got some great "naked baby" shots last night to torture her with when she is older. She is so adorable with her little chubby, rolly thighs. I'll save those for her wedding slide show, ha!